Yesterday I read a news story about a school that up and decided to give up playground rules. Oh they still had the "Don't hit people" kind of rules, but the kids were given FREEDOM. Freedom to climb trees. Freedom to play in dirt and mud. Heck, they put out a bunch of nothing scraps and told the kids they could build whatever they wanted with it. And you know what happened? They remembered how to be kids. In fact, they had so much fun playing they were no longer getting into trouble. The principal says they were able to have less staff outside because the kids were just HAPPY and that happiness translated into the classroom. Less outbursts. More learning.
Recess used to be my kids' favorite thing at school. Until they took away freedom. Recess started like a support group. All the kids were required to stand in a circle on the blacktop and collectively strategize. For 5-10 minutes. They ALL had to stand there if a few were screwing around and WAIT. Losing precious minutes of playtime. Then they had to share "their recess goals." My son's recess goal was to get as far away from school as possible.
In winter, they weren't allowed to pick up the snow. I'm not kidding. Someone might throw it. They weren't supposed to keep score in games. Someone might win.
At the end, they were required to circle back up and affirm each other. "I like the way Rosie shared the ball with me." I'm rather glad my son rolls his eyes as he recollects this. Kids aren't supposed to think like shrinks. I'm all for shrinks. I'm studying to be one for goodness' sake. But kids should be kids.
Which brings me to our yard. Again.
Gabe has land. The land between the trees. In the side yard. That borders our church parking lot. Where everyone can see it. Gabe is our free spirit who needs to create. constantly. There are half finished projects everywhere. In his room, in our basement, in the yard. In between the trees at any moment there are hanging ropes, ladders, half sawed stumps, massive holes, traps. It looks like a Red Neck yard. There I said it. But the thing is, creating and exploring is who Gabe is right now. It's how he learns. It's how he expresses himself and finds joy.
A few days ago, a preschool teacher was taking her class outside on a walk. They stood on the top of the hill and looked down into our yard. For a long time. I don't know what they were thinking. But I'm sure it wasn't, "My, what a well-kept yard."
And I was embarrassed. Until I remembered our parenting is intentional. Might be messy, but it's intentional. Kids and their spaces shouldn't have to look perfect all the time. Learning is messy. Like a really great recess.
**Oh! And it turns out Gabe wasn't sick. "Just" a migraine from eating eggs. :-(
