Today a Friend Asked Me

How do you do it?  How do you get through a day where someone tells you that your child has a disease so real that she could catch an infection she might not recover from?

Those questions are what we asked ourselves six years ago as we filled out the medical checklist during the adoption process.  HOW could we adopt a child that we could lose?

I remember crying after church one Sunday just wrestling with my heart in it.  We had already said yes to her referral.  She was no longer an "idea."  She was a real child.  With a real need.  And she was ours.  How could I let myself fall in love when she could go to Jesus sooner than me?  How would I cope with that?  Could I live through that kind of loss?

For us, it was never really a choice.  However hard it could be to say goodbye early, she was worth it.  And she is worth it.

The reality is that so many children around the world are literally dying without the medical treatment they need.  And even more importantly, they are dying without love.  They are dying without feeling a hand cup their cheek when they ask a question.  A kiss on their cheek at bedtime.  A hand in theirs as they walk.

Violet cannot ever remember being kissed before she came into our family.  

Can you even?

The question that we all have to wrestle with is

Am I willing to risk myself so that a child knows love?

Sometimes I try to imagine myself in those hard places.  Those institutions where hope never seems to shine.  What if it were me there?  In pain?  Looking for love in every face until I stop looking altogether?  And what if someone said, "I'm sorry.  I can't love you because you might not make it.  There's something wrong with you, you see.  I can't handle that.  You'll have to stay here and hope someone else comes."

SOMEONE has to say "I will take some pain so that you can have less."

Not for one second have we ever regretted adopting a child with significant medical needs.  Not because we're good or perfect or holy.  Not because we're more anointed or gifted.

We just said yes.  Because we are second.  And love is first.  And because

She.  is.  worth.  it.

Friends, really...to live clinching our hearts tight in our hands in an effort to protect them?  It robs us of life's greatest gifts.  When our hands are clenched, they aren't open to receive the blessings.

And children?  They are some of life's greatest treasures.

Sad News...Medical Update on Mia

Mia's at the hospital this morning and we received sad news.  She must stop her oral meds immediately because her white blood cell count is dangerously low...if she were to keep going, she could get an infection she wouldn't recover from.  Lord, have mercy.  Her numbers are low enough to stay without meds for about three weeks and then it's back to nightly shots in the stomach or overnight stays at the hospital with a drip.

She is handling the news well, all things considered.  Please pray for her hospital care team.  They are caring for a little one with cancer and it doesn't look good.  The nurses are in tears.

Thank you!

No Fear

If I had a dollar for every time I heard someone wish they could do something out of their comfort zone to make a difference, like adopt, Alice would be here.  

(You know, the one from the Brady Bunch who's supposed to be helping me to clean and feed these children!)

I'm convinced that what holds us all back from acting on our God-given dreams is FEAR.

Raise your hand if you're in the Scaredy Cat Club...I'll be the first to raise my hand.  Fear used to be my middle name.  Now it's "I used to be scared of absolutely everything but now I claim victory over fear because of Jesus and refuse to let darkness win because I was too cowardly to act."  It's a little long, but give a girl time.

The thing is, whatever it is that holds you back from what you were meant to do?  Look down deep and I bet the root cause is fear.  Marriage?  Fear.  Parenting?  Fear.  Adoption?  Fear.  New career?  Fear.  School?  Fear.  Overseas service trips?  Fear.  Giving?  Fear.  Sharing?  Fear.  

The smallest things in our life to the biggest, deepest problems in our world can't be helped when we're bogged down in fear.  It cripples.  It incapacitates.

But grace?  It frees us from fear.  Because when we truly know, when we truly understand how much we're loved and we truly believe God is that love...it drives out fear.  Fear and God don't go together.  They can't coexist.  When you're trusting in God and His promises, fear is cast out.

What is it that God is whispering to you right now?  Is there something you need to do?  Someone you need to talk to?  Someone you need to forgive?  A injustice you know you should fight?  A person you know needs love?  Someone you can clothe or feed?

Ask God to remove your fear.  And LIVE. 

"Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin!"

Mother Teresa

New Prosthetic!

"The only disability is a bad attitude."  Scott Hamilton

So yesterday I was impacted by hearing the testimony of Scott Hamilton...a man admired by the world, yet plagued with physical pain.  It was in his weakness that He found His God...and lasting peace.

In his story, he shared something we are reminded of daily around here....with God, all things are possible!  Violet shows us every day.  She's an overcomer.

This week Violet got her new prosthetic.  It's a lot like her first one, but with more support.  She is very proud of it and grinning ear to ear about it.  She got to help decide what it would look like cosmetically.  Shriner's provided a huge box of fabric and she picked her favorite and it was somehow transferred onto the plastic sheathing of the piece.

This means she's mobile and we can return the wheelchair!

 (Look at my baby...back on her first visit to Shriner's...when all she had to wear was a slipper.)

(Here she is now...all grown up...sniff sniff.
And here's Brock, the awesome creator of her custom pieces.  He earned her trust over the past two years.  We are so thankful to God for him!)

We've got some tweaking to do as the new leg is pinching in places, so we're back to Springfield next week to add some padding in places, but otherwise we're good to go!

Throughout this whole process, she's been amazing.  Really, she complained more about her chapped lips this week than she did about the surgical recovery.

We are learning so much from her.  Truly, your outlook on life determines so much of your experience in it.

Perspective of Olympic Proportions

1984 was good to me.  That year, in my ever-present ponytail and jeans, I met Mary Lou Retton and Scott Hamilton.  I cartwheeled my way through the summer grass and skated my way through winter on the creek out back, determined to be the next great Olympian.

(I was not discovered.  :-))

I remember popcorn bubbling up in a big pot of oil on the stove in our rented farmhouse, smelling all fresh and salty.  Mary would flip and vault and grin and I’d munch, dreaming it was me.  The winter games found our house too cold for the living room, so we would pile on my parents’ bed by their fireplace and drink hot chocolate and watch Scotty entertain on the ice.

I was 10.  Same as my Gabe.  Everything was good and right and gold medal perfect.

Now I’m the parent, sharing the games with my kids.  We hum along with the John Williams anthem, cheer for our favorite countries, stand in awe at the talent the athletes possess.  I watch my kids and I can see it in their eyes…they’re dreaming, too.  Thinking what it would like to be on the luge, on the skeleton, on the board, on the skates…and being the best in the world.

I smile.  Kids should hope.  They should dream big and imagine that anything is possible.  Winning a gold medal would be magical…

But there’s something even more incredible.  We've tasted it.  We've lived it.  And we declare it.  And Scott Hamilton can tell you all about how he found it 

here